D'var Torah

I particularly love those moments when the Torah shows us Judaism’s ability to change. This week’s Torah portion contains a mixture of laws. Some of them represent the most eternal concepts of ethics, such as keeping honest weights and measures, sharing some of your crops with those in need, and never abusing a laborer by withholding pay or a debtor by keeping their only garment from them as collateral.

Interspersed in this list are a few laws that govern social expectations, and these are not as eternal. There is a commandment to take a “wayward and defiant son” who does not obey his parents and stone him to death at the public square. Thankfully, this commandment is dealt with in the Talmud. The rabbis leave it theoretically in place (they could not openly ignore a divine commandment) but create so many impossible requirements that it could never be enforced. This famous Talmudic passage offers a glimpse of how people learn new ways of relating to each other over the centuries and the generations.

Another verse in the portion shows us how societies open their minds to new ways of seeing each other. It deals with an issue America is wrestling with at the moment. This commandment states,

“A woman must not put on man’s apparel, nor shall a man wear woman’s clothing; for whoever does these things is abhorrent to your God.”

This second commandment has not been handled by the rabbis in the same way as the first. While even most orthodox communities are far more open on this question today, this is one reason behind Reconstructionist Judaism’s founder Modecai Kaplan’s dictate that Jewish law should have “a vote but not a veto.” On complex issues that change with the times, we study the law but reserve the right not to follow it.

We have come a long way since this commandment was written, but not far enough. Last week, I was honored to stand with other TRS members at a planned rally which turned out to be a celebration. We were ready to urge Fairfax County Schools to continue to allow students to be addressed by their chosen names and pronouns, have access to facilities consistent with their gender identity, and respect their privacy regarding their transgender or gender-expansive status. The morning of the rally, though, the district confirmed they would do so. With this decision, they have joined Arlington, Alexandria, and Prince William counties in deciding not to follow new guidelines from the state.

It is appropriate that FCPS explained in their letter, “We believe that supporting our students and working with their parents and caregivers are not mutually exclusive.” These kinds of personal issues, which involve children, are sensitive and complex. Parents do need to be involved. At the same time, a student experiencing pressure at home or among peers needs a safe space at school where they can be themselves. It may make the difference between life and death.

I am grateful our local school boards will continue to provide that safe space, and that Judaism fosters the ability for religious traditions to learn and change over time.

Shabbat Shalom,

Rabbi Jeff Saxe